Beware of Men Who Cry....
One guy goes out with thirty women and is supposed to choose one. What could possibly go wrong? It’s kind of like watching a train wreck happen in slow motion. It is also oddly reminiscent of a trip to a fast food outlet. Will there be fries with that? Would you like to supersize? Who could say no?
And that might be the problem.
A guy going out with thirty women, and calling it love, is a pretty shallow premise. Love is by nature exclusive, and there are those lingering questions about just went on in the fantasy suite with the other two women. Might put a stick in the spokes when love wants to progress. Intimacy is not designed to be a team sport.
Beware of men who cry too much. It’s like the old tale of crying wolf. Biologically men are not as predisposed as women, to bare their feelings to the world. The deepest feelings are by nature private. Hence, I am convinced that most open crying is a shallow attempt at deflection from the real issues. Men cry as a shabby ploy when they get caught with their hand in the cookie jar. It is therefore disingenuous for Peter (the current bachelor) to cry about “his journey” and act conflicted. I repeat. A show where a guy goes out with thirty beautiful women... what could go wrong? How about basic biology vs temptation?
This charade plays itself out year after year so I was finally relieved that one contestant, Madison Prewett called Peter out over tasting the wares like samples at Costco, and then coming back to her like nothing happened. And why is Peter’s family supportive of him sleeping around like a whore on vacation and then pretending to be honest? Where’s dad sternly taking Peter aside and telling him to have some honour and man up? We are living in a world of boys who act badly and then cry like it is somebody else’s fault.
My own experiences have led me to conclude that in matters of love less is more. Better to love one woman well if you can, than many badly. In love, volume does not stand in as a substitute for quality. Sometimes it is good to see the ups and downs with one person. It forces you to look at things more honestly because love is by nature a mirror. You won’t have to make a show of tears because it’s not what you feel, it’s what you do that ultimately counts. Words are cheap, actions tell all. Sorry boys, acting won’t help here.
I am encouraged, that Madison Prewitt was strong enough to speak up, and show some real character. She did not go to the fantasy suite. She was not handing out candy samples. She was looking for somebody special. That is why in the end, if she is as smart as she looks, she will dump Peter the pilot on his own pile of discarded Kleenex and find a real man out there, one who is willing to commit.
I particularly liked Madison Prewett’s ring, which has a quote from the Song of Solomon in the Bible. The inscription in Hebrew says, “Ani L’dodi V’dodi Li - I am my beloved’s and my beloved is Mine”, a concept that Peter Weber has not apparently figured out yet.
I repeat to the girls out there; beware of men who cry too much. And, if I were to offer advice to Madison Prewett? Dump Peter and keep on moving, as fast as you can. And you Peter. You’re an idiot. Shakespeare nailed it when he said “The gentleman doth protest too much”.
Maybe it’s too much to ask that a “reality show” offer any real life advice. Love should be special. Exclusive. Not a trip around the world with many, as much as a journey through the world with the one you chose. In this season of the Bachelor, Madison Prewett’s call on it was pretty accurate. Love is not the problem here, fidelity is. Somebody got hook-up culture mixed up with the real deal.
My beloved. The words on your lips, should leave you with a smile. And some private feelings that will never make you cry in public.